Do you ever look at yourself and wonder what happened? I have have been thinking this for a few weeks now.
I have been wondering what happened to my house (in desperate need of some fresh paint and updating). Wondering what happened to me that I am completely comfortable going out of the house with wet hair, no make-up and jeans and an old t-shirt. What happened to the Sarah that was so full of energy I was bouncing off the walls.
I have also been wondering who I am. So many of you that follow my blog and I follow yours are these truly amazing Christians who seem to have it all together and are willing to follow God no matter what that means. I like to think I do but if I'm completely honest fear holds me back from sooooo much.
You know what I think happened? How about 4 years of infertility treatments, losing a child we were adopting at the last minute because I was pregnant, 2 very hard pregnancies. Adopting a child we hadn't planned on and walking out in complete faith to do so , having 3 children under the age of 6, taking a huge loss in finances due to the economy and OH THE LACK OF SLEEP having 3 small children.
I NEED TO FIND OUT WHO I AM!
So next week I am going to begin what I call my 90 Day Journey With God. I don't expect this to be an easy 90 days, I honestly expect it to be a hard 90 days. This is what it will look like for me:
1. Stop following most blogs for 90 day (sorry friends but I have to figure out who I am and not compare myself to other Christians).
2. Have an intense nutrition plan and exercise routine (hubby is doing this with me) so that I feel good and have energy again.
3. Commit to 90 days of time with God everyday and to choose to have God carry my fears during that time.
4. PAINT THE HOUSE!
5. Try to fix my hair and put make-up on to make myself feel better (this will probably be the hardest one to do).
Anyone else want to go on a 90 Journey with me?